Hello. It is I, Merlin, the Handsomest Cat In The World. A valerian pillow was bought for me, the King of the Household. I find it delightful. I have licked it into submission until it was soaked all through, many times. The people, however, find it less than thrilling. They brought it home on the same day as Mo (I suspect as a bribe) and put it in the same room as her. Joke’s on them – they thought she smelled like feet instead of the pillow! Ha ha!
Once they figured it out, though, they banished my lovely, lovely pillow to the balcony. Every time they opened the door, I would dash out and throw my paws around my pillow and lick it for hours while zoning out into a drugged stupor. Eventually it started to reek less, and now they allow it inside on special occasions.
This is one of them, and I’ve got business to attend to! Over and out.